Thanks for your patience, and hope the feedback was helpful for you. I won't begrudge you for deciding that you wrote enough as is. I did feel like some bits could've used some more elaboration to fill in gaps, especially the last few scenes of the second half where we're hugely timeskipping around that felt like it removed some of the buildup/punch to stuff like the ending note. It would've been nice to see those a bit more, but I suppose you've got a lot of fic left to show them off a bit as needed. There were a few worldbuilding elements alluded here and there that made me go 'wait, wha' from how they were casually dropped but not really elaborated on. It might have made each half have a bit more impact versus gobbling it all up in a straight shot. perhaps it's just a side effect of the average length of your chapters being much shorter, but I kinda wonder if this Special ought to have been done as a two-parter, since everything up to Fuji's last journal entry and everything that comes after are pretty self-contained and distinct from one another, and both parts are longer than the average PoV chapter thus far. It's not a common tack taken for 'I just wanna be loved', but you seem to be owning it well, and boy is your execution of it chilling.Īs for stuff I didn't like. On the one hand, there's something pitiful and childlike about the way he was so hungry for affection and companionship at earlier part of the special, and it makes the mass death that he brings about from the midpoint onward all the more jarring because of it. Not sure whether or not I liked Bahamut more or less in the wake of this special. I still think that Gene's an asshole, and I don't fully trust him, but I definitely have a bit more empathy for him and understand how he got to where he is today.

It was a nice glimpse into Gene's backstory, where he came from, and what became of Earth back in the day when thus far we'd only gotten it in little hints here and there outside of dev chatter elsewhere on the net. Kinda think it'd have had more impact if Gene got to see more of the gang initially meeting Bahamut and how hopeful everyone was and then waking up to see this, but it's still a decent gut punch of an ending.

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